Disagreement

I am right, so you are wrong.

You want me to do that, but I do not want to.

We should eat here, not there.

They want to work with me, but I want to work alone.

Countless disagreements span all aspects of our lives. If we are alive, there will be disagreements. Since we are all our own individual people, with our own thoughts, perspectives, and opinions, there will be an infinite number of times when we think differently from someone else. There is potential for disagreements to foster constructive conversation as well as destructive, catastrophic consequences. How you view a disagreement is what will drive the particular result.

Good teams disagree. Disagreements should not be feared; they should be utilized for what they can reveal. Disagreements mean that other perspectives are being considered and discussed. Everything should not be agreed upon in the quest for greatness. Think of any company that was founded in a garage with a couple of founders. Disagreements ran rampant, but it was in these environments where the most successful ideas won out. No initial idea is perfect. It takes disagreement to hammer away at all the cracks in any idea, to break down the weaknesses, and rebuild. Constructive disagreement leads to results. Constructive disagreement is what builds the strongest products, plans, relationships, and paths forward.

Disagreement can also be destructive and break down the bonds formed. Some disagreements lead to absolute splits as opposed to breakdowns leading to new connections. Disagreements when destructive can cause relationships to sour. They can cause business ideas to fall apart. They can erase progress. To avoid the destructive side of disagreement, it is important to realize the scale of the disagreement. If it is not a big deal in the grand scheme of time, do you really want to lose a relationship over it? The answer, most likely being no, means that sometimes you should accept the other side of the argument and move on. There will be other times where you can stand up and fight; it does not have to be every battle. It is also important to realize and see other perspectives when engaging in disagreements. Constantly shutting out other perspectives or being mind-numbingly stubborn about your own opinion can lead to disagreements blowing up. We should always be open to other perspectives, and in being open, we can avoid results that are fatal to our relationships as a result of disagreements.

Am I right with this perspective, or am I wrong? You decide, and let’s discuss. Let’s see where any disagreement takes us.