Tristan’s Type Day 69 of 365

Control What You Can Control

· 2 min read

There are so many parts of our lives we do not have complete control over. For example, we do not decide what others think of us, we do not decide if we receive a job offer, and we do not decide which school accepts us; all of these choices are made by someone else based on the information we provide. We must control what we can control. By controlling what we can control, we position ourselves to choose happiness and our own outcomes as opposed to becoming stressed or troubled with issues outside of our power.

Controlling what we can control gives us a breath of fresh air when it comes to life. When external issues happen, we can react without letting them ruin our days or weeks. By accepting that there is very few in life we have complete power over, we can better receive the external stimuli shaping the world around us. This is not to say we do not care about what happens in life around us— we absolutely do. This is simply saying that by having this perspective, we are better able to maintain content and upbeat attitudes no matter what life throws at us.

We are also able to focus our energy and efforts on the parts of life we can control. The work we produce and how we produce it are two key points. We can choose to focus on our output while not focusing on what others will think of it. We have no control over the opinions of others, so it is a disservice to expend energy on this. By putting all of our energy into our output and trying our best, we can feel good about our work while letting others decide for themselves. We have the power to work hard and showcase our output to the world; everything that comes next is out of our control.

By getting bogged down by the uncontrollable in our lives, we may be pulled to feel jealousy instead of happiness when those around us succeed. For example, we may be upset if someone close to us received the job or opportunity we individually wanted. That feeling is a rational and acceptable response to feel, but we should instead try to feel the opposite. Through an acceptance of controlling what we can control, we are more easily able to feel happiness for others. By understanding that good things happen to other people, our peers, competitors, and colleagues, we are able to unlock genuine happiness for them when they succeed. Good things happen to others for reasons, and having sincere happiness for them helps maintain our individual center of peace as opposed to becoming filled with negative emotions.

Controlling what we can control in our own lives sets us on a path to finding individual fulfillment. Once we accept this perspective, we are able to begin a journey of less stress and worry and instead channel this energy into making sure we power our pursuits to the best of our abilities.

Originally published in the Tristan’s Type newsletter